| Mitch_A 2004-10-20, 5:47 pm |
| Couple more just to piss off the peanut gallery 
There are two kinds of lawyers, those who know the law and those who know
the judge.
The trouble with the legal profession is that 98% of its members give the
rest a bad name.
Whats the difference between a dead dog on the street and a dead lawyer in
the street? There are skid marks in front of the dog.
What's black and brown and look great on lawyers? Dobermans
What's the difference between a Rooster and a Lawyer? A rooster clucks
defiance.
What do lawyers and sperm have in common? One in 50,000,000 has a chance
of becoming a human being.
Why does the American Bar Association prohibit sex between attorneys and
their clients? To prevent the client for being billed twice for what is
essentially the same service.
Why do they bury lawyers 27 feet under? 'Cuz deep, deep down, they're
good people!
What's the difference between a Catfish and a lawyer? One is a scum
sucking bottom dweller, and the other is a fish.
Why does California have the most lawyers and New Jersey the most toxic
waste dumps? New Jersey had first pick.
How can you tell when a lawyer is well hung? When you can't get your
finger between the noose and his neck.
What the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute? The prostitute
quits after you're dead!
What's the difference between a porcupine and two lawyers in a BMW? A
porcupine has the pricks on the outside.
How can you tell when a lawyer is lying? Their lips move.
How do you get a lawyer out of a tree? Cut the rope.
How do you stop a lawyer from drowning? Take your foot off it's head
What's the difference between a lawyer and a bucket of shit? The bucket.
What's the difference between a lawyer and a duck? Occasionally a duck
will stick its bill up its XXX.
If you see a lawyer on a bicycle, why don't you swerve to hit him? It
might be your bicycle.
What do lawyers use as contraceptives? Their personalities.
Mitch
"Don Burnette" <d.burnette@clothes.comcast.net> wrote in message
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